Pilgrimage #2

The winds crash, something bangs on the side on our cabin jolting us awake. The hurricane force winds have arrived and both Nadine and I know sleep will be scarce. To God’s glory Penelope never woke through it all. 

So pilgrimage is hard. Of course I knew hat going in and especially trying to pilgrimage with 2 little ones, but the amount of rain and storms didn’t help. Getting the girls to sleep was the hardest thing. They got cranky and hangry and we were exhausted by the time they were asleep. 

This left little time for reading, prayer or even hang out time. The routine I wanted was thrown out with the sun early on. There was no reading on the beach as the waves crashed in. There were no prolonged times sitting in his presence. So what was this pilgrimage?

There were some amazing times. The rain and winds were an opportunity to see the largest waves crashing against the land. It was divine. We had a magical time with Minnie Mouse and others at Disney. We met great people and saw animals and creatures. We played together and drove lots. The biggest surprise location was Vegas. Penelope danced and we loved just walking and seeing the sites. 

In the large amount of time I’m not sure it’s clear what the pilgrimage showed me. In reflecting on my last post here’s what happened: My life shut up. 

I didn’t realize this until the last driving day. Nadine and I were talking through the trip and now hopes for being back. We began to talk about specifics of the ministry then I saw it. This was the first time I thought about ministry in a while. This is the purpose of a sabbatical after all, but as I let that thought simmer I got excited. I had been resting. 

Rest looks different in different seasons. Sometimes it’s sleep or sport or good friends. Sometimes it’s camping or mountains or bright lights. In my case most of that was present but more importantly I was occupied by something other than my current ministry. My mind, emotions and spirit rested from work. I don’t think I will know the benefit of that until return to work. 

My neighbour reminds me often of the mental and emtoitonal strain of my job. He says he could never do it. Though not a church goer or believer himself, he understands the social aspect of my work. Then I think, “you know you’re right.” My mind is constantly going.

I am blessed with the great ability to shut off my mind towards work when I’m not there and with my family. But it’s still there and weighs on me subconsciously. This is not negative and comes with the work, but I have to know how to release it and manage it. God knew we humans needed rythyms of rest. A sabbath day and even a year of jubilee. The extended rest does things a day can’t. I look forward to seeing what that looks like. 

Sitting at the end of the pilgrimage I am glad to be out of the van. A puking 2 year old was enough to force me to drive the extra 5 hours to get home early. But with the awful came the great. With the pain and struggle came rest. Though they seem like opposites, they actually make a great couple.